Amber Williams

So I've been here now for a month and a half and bless hubbies heart he has dealt with my bi-polar tendencies like a pro! I have had days where I'm fantastic and days where I'm depressed and not wanting to get out of bed. I've laughed with him, cried and snipped at him and not a single time does that amazing man ever complain or bash me or walk away. How did I get soo lucky!! (LOVE THAT MAN!) But seriously, it's been a roller coaster of emotions for me. I thought that it would be so easy to fit in and make friends and continue life with some ease but instead I've been a huge container of mixed emotions and depending on what emotional ingredient I put in that day out comes the special flavor of Amber (again, hence the name "one-woman Circus"! LOL!)...and some days aren't as tasty as others! But surprisingly, there have been a lot things about me that I was so sure of that I just don't know of anymore! I never called myself shy, and here I find...

Our Wedding Promises: (name), I promise to trust you and honor you I will laugh with you and cry with you I will love you faithfully Through the best and worst Through the difficult and the easy What may come I promise that I will always be there As I give you my hand to hold. So I give you my whole heart forever. Wedding Poetry: By Steven Curtis Chapman: “I Will Be Here” If in the morning when you wake, If the sun does not appear, I will be here. If in the dark we lose sight of love, Hold my hand and have no fear, I will be here. I will be here, When you feel like being quiet, When you need to speak your mind I will listen. Through the winning, losing, and trying we'll be together, And I will be here. If in the morning when you wake, If the future is unclear, I will be here. As sure as seasons were made for change, Our lifetimes were made for years, I will be here. I will be here, And you can cry on my shoulder, When the mirror tells us we'r...

Phew! What a wonderful past week! My heart is glowing and there's a permanent grin on my face today! I can't remember what I've posted in the past (I didn't look) so I will start with last Friday! Logically, I've been itching to make some friends and Friday night the one girl friend that I have right now invited me to go out with her and two others for a night in the town! Though they said it wasn't the best of all nights out there, I had a great time! One, because I was out with people and not alone! Two, because it was interesting to view the people and get a sense of things and so forth. It was just refreshing to get out and feel a part of something! Our wedding ceremony went great! Before the ceremony, we invited everyone over to the apartment for mimosa's (I didn't have any, I was too busy running around trying to get ready!) then we went off the the registrar office to have the ceremony, which I thought for a small short ceremony that it went...

In less than a week I will officially be married! I'm soo excited and anxious! So the agenda is to go to the ceremony, which starts at 11:30 then right after we are going to take everyone to a nice formal lunch with fantastic food, drinks and dessert! (There is 11 of us total) I'm going to wear my wedding dress to the ceremony and then I have a more casual dress that I'm going to wear afterward for the formal lunch! We have music and flowers and cute little decorated room where the ceremony will take place! My fiancee has been so supportive in helping with all the planning and preparing and it's just been a really fantastic experience so I hope the ceremony will go just as good! (Fingers crossed!) And yes, hopefully people will take PLENTY of pictures for us! So, this week has been spent doing the last minute errands needed to be ready for the wedding and I REALLY hope it goes smooth! :) Keep me in your thoughts and prayers! Live, Laugh, Love!

So today has left me full of mixed emotions. The workout at the gym and the sunny warm walk home was definitely a mood-booster! I was grateful for the break from the freezing cold, cloudy, dreary, rainy weather. But as the day moves on, from my apartment window I can see the neighbors walking by with there family, friends and loved ones and it makes me sad. It made me homesick for my family and miss my friends. That's where I realized that maybe I was more lonely than I thought. I knew that this move was going to mean a lot of change and adjustment and until I'm able to work, my fiancee has to work, so it means he's gone the better part of the week sleeping in his truck. We've talked about him going back into real estate again after I start working. Ultimately, I want to see him doing something he loves and enjoying the rest of his working life. So, we will see what the future will bring! But I miss him a lot when he's gone and hope to have him home every night so...

Life has been good! Slow during the week then a mad dash over the weekend (trying to get things done that includes Dave's help...and a car! LOL!) But during the week, I'm spending my time cleaning, cooking, wandering around the town, watching T.V. reading, and playing on the computer. Sounds exciting huh? :) It's not bad. Some days I'm a little bored, but I'm trying to make the best of this because I know I will be going back to work soon! (Which I am looking forward to as I know it will be a big help in making friends and getting to know the area better. But until then, my way of getting around is walking and exploring. I think I'm starting to get over some of the shock. I know I draw some attention, but I don't notice it as much as I used to. I feel bad though for the people who are with me though because they tend to get the bulk of the questions. Yesterday my soon-to-be in-law's stopped in and invited me to go out around the town with them, which ...

So this is my new home, this is my new way of life. Up to today, I've been pretty positive of things, but this morning has me feeling a little out of sorts and I'm not sure why. I think ultimately maybe it's because it just hit me that I'm here. This isn't a dream and this is a reality I'm am going to have to brave up to it. I think I'm also a little more lonely and scared than I was admitting to myself. Don't get me wrong, I'm not 2nd guessing any choices I've made! I'm glad I made this choice, but I think the "Culture Shock" is finally setting in. I feel grateful that of all places I could move to, at least I have some sort of bearings here. I may not understand everyone and everything, but I understand most people. What I'm finding is that there are adjustments I need to make (as choices aren't as abundant as they are in the U.S. In fact, I've come to the conclusion that American's are down-right SPOILED! You ne...