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Re-Invention

Life is soo random...there's the invention of life and then the constant re-invention of life...or at least that seems to be the motto of my life! A little consistency in schedule and life would be nice! Someday life will be what I expect (grounded and whole). But till then, maybe sometime soon I'll get a hold of this monkey on my back and rid it indefinitely!

How often do you look back on life and realize just how amazing your journey has been? I can't believe how many heartbreaks, tears and pain I lived through but in comparison of all the laughter, friendship and love, it's ALL been more than worth the it! Every year I make 1 New Years resolution to myself (mostly because I can never hold to my new years res'!): "No Regrets". To this day, I feel as though I have live up to that very well. I look at every minute of life (good or bad) as a stepping stone to making me a better person. Instead of seeing my mistakes as a negative, I chose to learn and grow from them...Which consistently spurs on the "re-invention".

I look at my moving to England as a part of this re-invention. This is a whole new chance for me to start over, re-invent myself with a new group of people and to become more the person I want to be as show it. It's hard to overcome people's already made perceptions of you. I think a lot of times though, I just try too hard. You can't make 100% of people like you 100% of the time. When I was younger and went to counseling for my eating disorder (which is an whole other blog post!) I was asked by the counselor at that time "why does other people's opinions matter so much to you?" My response then: "Because without their opinions I don't know who I am."...Sad huh? I was 19 then. 9 years later, I sometimes slip back into that same mentality, but it's gotten much better. This is a good chance to build a new life as the me I want to be, and see how people respond to it. A piece of my heart will always be with those I love and deeply care about in Boise, but I'm also excited for new opportunities ahead for personal growth...Re-invention.

Ultimately, I think that we all should be in some sort of constant re-invention mode, because if your stagnant, your not growing as a person. The trick is just finding the best way to move yourself forward. Going to England is my advancement. I had a friend the other day ask me if I was sure that this was the best decision. I told him that I had never been so sure of anything in my life. I hope you all find that certainty too!

Live, Laugh, Love!

Comments

Anonymous said…
Beautiful and truthful post. :)

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