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A Leap of Faith

Once in a while I get a little too deep inside my head where the thoughts run wild and free and dangerously. When I say dangerously, I mean it in the sense of how it can emotionally effect me...Good, or bad. The bad tends to bring emotions of fear, anxiety, doubt, and concern. One of the worse games it plays is the "what if" game (I'm sure I've discussed this before). "What if it doesn't work?" "What if I made a mistake?" "What if I just shot myself in the foot?" "What if? What if? What if?!" It's a HORRIBLE game! It brings on so much fear and self-doubt!

Ok...So the point of this rant is just because of the general stress I'm feeling over this whole long distance relationship and moving thing. I KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt that I love him...In fact, I KNOW I have 20 times more of a deep love connection than I ever did my ex-husband. He is EVERYTHING I always wanted and dreamed of in a man. He literally is my definition of "perfect"...I'm positive for me, there is no one closer to what I want and need than my boyfriend. But with that is fear...What if he decides that I'm not perfect for him? what if I pack up my small world and travel all the way to him to find that we are not a match? What if I make a mistake? What's funny is that in my heart, I feel at peace about him. I know that everything will work out and still my head wants to play devils-advocate! (Which just so you all know, it won't win...I won't let it this time!)

I spend too much time doing what my head says is safe vs. what my heart knows I REALLY want! I've decided although following my heart makes me extremely vulnerable and has a high probability of getting hurt in some form or another, that I just need to take this leap of faith to see whether or not it will really work. I'm tired of living in fear aren't you guys? Life is just to short!

So, here I am, prepping to take my big leap of faith. It's either going to be the hardest fall of my life, or the most amazing leap ever. Either way, I'll keep you posted and encourage you all to find that fear you have and face it by taking your own leap of faith!

Good luck and happy landing!
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