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Just a little overwhelming...

So in exactly 2 weeks I will be in England (or at least still on the plane to!) for a trip that I thought would NEVER come! Just like last post, I'm excited, scared, nervous and more! I can't wait to see him...I can't wait for my 2 week break from work! I can't wait to be in his arms...I never in a million years thought I would be in a place to miss the "little things" like a little butt pat, the way a man comes up behind you and wraps his arms around you, the look they give you when they think you don't notice...Don't take it for granted...I miss it all!

This doesn't sound soo bad right? That's not the hard part! The hard part is the packing, selling, moving, my work (who is being completely obnoxious!) but most of all...My dog. My dog is like my rock, my friend, my safety net! I know it's dumb and I can see the multitudes of people rolling their eyes but stop and think a moment! If managed right, they are therapeutic! They actually even show statistic saying that dogs lower stress and weight! But that's not the point! The point is through thick and thin, my dog has loyaly been there when no one else was (not that she had a choice) and chose to show me love, kindness and friendship. I'm a good owner, but at this point, I'm not the BEST owner for her...The changes in my circumstances (unpredictable) really forced us into this position and now I'm left wishing my friend a goodbye hoping that the next family will make her last half of life better than what the first one served at.

I have this nagging guilt that says I'm being mean...It hurts me to think that she may confused and hurt and wondering "What did I do wrong? why doesn't she love me anymore?"...It's NOT that at all...It's like that saying "if you love him than let him go..." I'm hoping that this will provide her the life she deserves.

Yes, again, I know this sounds pathetic as it is a dog...But to me, she's more than a dog. there are STRONG emotional ties and securities with her...It's all so overwhelming to do as my world is already so shook up!

To my precious friend...Yes, I loved you more than you will ever know and I will always love you and have you in my heart. It was not your fault, you were always more than enough for me. I pray that you will get in a new owner what you deserve: abundance of love and attention.

With all my unconditional love,
Your sad owner.

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