Amber Williams

Today I had to really show how much I loved my friend by letting her go. This was a long time coming and I know ultimately it is what is best for both of us. She deserves someone who can give her more and that is just not me. My dog was amazing. She was loyal, loving, funny, quirky and everything that anyone could ask in a best friend. I'm so grateful for the years of love, loyalty and friendship she gave me. I know it's silly, but you have to understand that for 6 years, she was there when I was alone which gave me security. When I was sad, she would snuggle with me and give me kisses. She rejoiced with me, she played with me, we smiled together and ultimately, we took care of each other. We went through a lot together including my divorce. She wasn't just a pet, so was family. So that being said, I would like to say to my friend starting a new chapter in her life: I hope you understand why I let you go...it was because I loved you enough to give you better. They say "

Its funny that certain people always thought I would be just a pee on. Well, it's nice for once to see you sweating the bullets! You see, I hate being peed on, but I also know what goes around comes around and with a little bit of hard work and some good karma, all the sudden I don't seem so weak! I love how you think you can play the emotional cards on me such as "Leaving the love of family and close friends!"...What you don't realize is that I don't care...It's not that I don't care about the love of family and close friends mind you, because I do, it's that all my family and friends are completely supportive and excited for me about this, so trying to use them against me is pointless because I already have "their blessings". I've got the love and support from the people I CARE about! It's just that you think I'm impressionable and naive, but what it has come down to is that I say anything just to shut you up! You think your

So in exactly 2 weeks I will be in England (or at least still on the plane to!) for a trip that I thought would NEVER come! Just like last post, I'm excited, scared, nervous and more! I can't wait to see him...I can't wait for my 2 week break from work! I can't wait to be in his arms...I never in a million years thought I would be in a place to miss the "little things" like a little butt pat, the way a man comes up behind you and wraps his arms around you, the look they give you when they think you don't notice...Don't take it for granted...I miss it all! This doesn't sound soo bad right? That's not the hard part! The hard part is the packing, selling, moving, my work (who is being completely obnoxious!) but most of all...My dog. My dog is like my rock, my friend, my safety net! I know it's dumb and I can see the multitudes of people rolling their eyes but stop and think a moment! If managed right, they are therapeutic! They actually even s

Once in a while I get a little too deep inside my head where the thoughts run wild and free and dangerously. When I say dangerously, I mean it in the sense of how it can emotionally effect me...Good, or bad. The bad tends to bring emotions of fear, anxiety, doubt, and concern. One of the worse games it plays is the "what if" game (I'm sure I've discussed this before). "What if it doesn't work?" "What if I made a mistake?" "What if I just shot myself in the foot?" "What if? What if? What if?!" It's a HORRIBLE game! It brings on so much fear and self-doubt! Ok...So the point of this rant is just because of the general stress I'm feeling over this whole long distance relationship and moving thing. I KNOW beyond a shadow of a doubt that I love him...In fact, I KNOW I have 20 times more of a deep love connection than I ever did my ex-husband. He is EVERYTHING I always wanted and dreamed of in a man. He literally is my def